Friday, 16 December 2016

1/4 of a century...

With my birthday being only ten days away - TEN! I've decided to come back to my somewhat, recently, neglected blog (sorry about that!) and post a letter to myself in preparation for my 25th year in this strange world, so here goes:


Dear Katy,

                So, you made it to 25, a whole quarter of a century(!) and according to the plans you made in primary school, you haven't quite achieved your goal of being married with two children (preferably twins) and you're not exactly in the job of your dreams (not that you were ever sure of what that was) but I think that you've come to learn that not everything goes to plan and that's okay. 

This year hasn't exactly been the kindest to you and I know you're hoping that the next one will be much smoother and happier for you but I want you to remember that sometimes, it's out of your control and that's why I wanted to write this letter to you, so that if things are starting to look as bleak as they have done this year, you can look back on the words you've written to yourself and it can offer you some sort of guidance and act as a reminder that you got through the tough times once before so  you can get through them again.


Now of course, this topic covers everything from boys, to friends, to family, to work colleagues but I want you to remember that ultimately the one person you need to concern yourself with the most in any relationship is YOU. 

Sometime it's your right to be selfish and I promise you that's okay. 

Speak up for yourself, don't settle for anything less than you think is right and don't belittle yourself with un-happiness just to suit the other party. 

And of course this doesn't mean you should be horrible with your selfishness but just remember this quote:

'more often than not, tough decisions are tough, not because you don't know what you want but because you know that what you want is going to be hard and has potential to hurt others'. 

Remember that sometimes, in the end, being selfish can actually result in selflessness so... be brave and trust your gut instinct. Your head and heart are usually a good source to go by, so listen to them and go with them.


You've left a job, been un-employed, been rejected and accepted and put it this way... throughout each scenario, you've survived, no matter how tough it may have been at the time. 

Much like with relationships, take each day as it comes, put yourself first, and just enjoy new experiences and take all the learning you can, and if you don't think it's for you, walk away because there's always something new out there and ultimately in any business that's not your own, you are just a number, so don't get too caught up into the unnecessary. The door closes on the business when your shift is up and that's where your mind should too. Every day is different, so take each day as a challenge and remember that there's always a tomorrow.

Please don't get hung up on the fact that you've not found 'the one' and just look at every new step as being one closer to the dream you're so keen to find. 

Oh and remember, money isn't everything - yes, you may have got yourself into debt this year from taking time out of work but I think it taught you that you don't always need what you think you need and luxuries can be put aside from time to time (although don't get me wrong, it's so nice when you can treat yourself!)


Okay, so your health isn't a particularly safe subject because it comes with it's own ups and downs but let's put it this way... you're still alive and all the time you're trying new methods to help, is all the time you're trying to keep this shitty (excuse the pun, if you get it) disease at bay. The doctors are intent on keeping you as much in remission as possible and you can help yourself by working with them and listening to your body. Do what you can and when you can and live your life to the fullest. Always remember that it could be worse, just as much as it could be better but don't let this define you. You're stronger than you think!


So there we go, three main topics that have got you feeling down and really, when you think about it, you've known the positives from them all along but you've just been to blinded to put them first whilst in the situations and so have forgotten to take your own advice. So, as I said, re-read this when you need to and let's hope 25 can bring you all the happiness you've been longing for and deserve.

Oh, and just as a side note...

Remember that time when you let all your nerves go out of the window and you put your brave face on and just went for it and said yes to the things you wouldn't usually? Remember how good that felt?  Live by that. Say yes! Do new things! It's exciting and can show you a whole new you, you didn't know existed. Make 25 the year of chances and challenges and just keep smiling, Katy!

With love, hugs, kisses and special (birthday) wishes from...


(just a few selfies from this year!)